Showing posts from March, 2018

Just keep swimming

So what the fuck have I done all week?

Activate brain thing. warning we detect the presence of alcamahol. cognitive function may be impaired.

Umm, I went to the dentist, hells yeah! and bonus my teeth aren't as bad as expected. the dentist was a little worried because i have been through a bunch of chemo so that can affect the food hole tools.

I also went and had an x-ray and now have to arrange appointments for fillings but that's what it takes.

I watched a government auction, and vans are way more expensive than I imagined, so my expectations are shifting. Instead of getting a longer term thing I am aiming for a break even as soon as possible and do the bare minimum to survive, so that means an old cheap shit van, do up the inside and when it fails, buy a new one and rip out the insides from one and put it in the new one.

It will make it a sort of iterative design which is okay.

Sold some things on gumtree, or did I do that already.. nope I sold them th…

Too sane for my own good

Back to where we were, here is the post from February 25th 2016

"Had breakfast at Bambi's Kitchen on East Terrace with Ian and Gaia this morning before heading to the doctors. , cheers for the service Vish :D I recommend it. SO.. Update time. Bringing those people who don't know up to speed, I had a preliminary diagnosis of cancer a few weeks ago.
what had started as abdominal pain(similar to wind/gas) sent me to the doctor who recommended a CT which found a 9.5cm soft tissue mass..
for a quick guide to how large that is its about the size of my fist. there is another mass, and a lesion on my liver.
Of course when you find something like that you need to find out what it is, so i had a biopsy, and the prelim results showed a rare kind of cancer.
since then i have had another CT of abdomen and chest, and a whole body PET scan to check for any additional parts of my body Fast forward to this morning and I get the results of the PET scan.
First the good news, no evidence that th…

Nowhere is scary

The closer I get to living nowhere the more anxiety I feel about it.
This last week and a bit, because it's Thursday and not Sunday Organised a loan for the future vehicle, waiting on approvalRequested and received help from my bestie Annie's dad Paul in purchasingFinished packing, I don't have anything left in the house except that which is for sale.Posted gumtree adds for the remainder of the itemsPlanned for test drives this coming SaturdayPacked up my car, it all fits yay!Started scouting locations to crash and relax, so far so good.Decided on waiting six months before publishing information about homelessness in case of negative attention having an impact on meTested my gym shower routine, so far so good but a bit coldScouted locations for sleeping, street lights are the worst. need to figure something else out.Where am I going to dry my towel? :( The biggest one is sleep, and relaxation. A single night of scouting has made me very uncomfortable for my immediate futur…

Winning the shittest lottery

Hmm, so last time I got my biopsy done.

What do I remember from that time, Ian being a great friend and holding my hands a bit, Sam, Ronan, the stalwarts Annie and Annie, many tears with my sister Kathryn.

I was told that it was called Desmoplastic Small Round Cell Tumor. or DSRCT or short. Ian my doctor friend did a little bit of reading on the subject and came back with a figure of < 15% survival rate over five years.. shit.. the chance of survival is so low.

I want to take a minute to explain something that I havent really talked about very much, and it still largely applies. I'm not overly fond of life, after a pretty bad breakup and planning for suicide I managed to drag myself back to life but the lustre that once was was largely gone, having been replaced with a sort of matrix'y dissociation and lethargy. I had ended up choosing that if life was going to be the way, then It had better be fun, and so that's what I had been pursuing for the previous six or so year…

It's Not a Tumor

This is going a fair bit back in time and i'm pretty tired...

The GP tells me the results of the CT scan, two large soft tissue masses in my abdominal cavity, and a very small node on my liver. The larger of the two was about the size of my fist, and the other more like a golf ball. like WTF the size of my fist is huge... Well now we know that they exist i can feel the larger one, i kinda just thought it was a fairly chunky piece of feces not a full on tumor.

I don't like to get excited early, so I'm taking it pretty easy at the moment,  yes people get cancer all the time, but I don't get anything that interesting happen to me, let alone the big C. So let's not get too excited and find out what the course of action is.

My doctor books me in for a biopsy to find out what the tumors are made of.

My this point i have told all my good friends and family about the things that have been happening, so there is anticipation on many fronts, I can't go silent by this poin…

Moving to Nowhere

OK i guess this week has been pretty busy.

The storage unit is finally rented and I have started moving my things into it. Sorting the things I have into bin / recycle / garage sale / give away.

The hardest part of this for me is the destruction of the original packaging. I keep all the original packaging for all the things i own in case i want to on sell them in the future, or give them away. that way the person receiving it gets all the goods. But that's impossible for a lot of things i want to take with me this time. I'm not putting empty boxes into storage.

Sheesh, if that's the hardest part i must be OK.

Pretty much everything I am doing at the moment isn't exciting, well not counting getting drunk with new friends, partying in mclaren vale, catching up with Brad to discuss the electricals, sleep overs.

So not counting all the exciting things yeah its mundane, sorting and packing, and more sorting, and box tetris.

I did receive another house sitting gig, but alas…